Reflections

I'm now blogging in the school computer centre cos the internet in my hostel has been down for 2 days already, and i have to wait for another 15 mins at least to get my notes printed. Having the internet down really reminds me of how much we depend on IT, and begs the question as to whether the Internet is really indispensable to our lives now.

Anyway, school hasn't been really good for me, partly cos i am still struggling to deal with my inner emotions..an old time problem. These days i have been thinking and am reminded that Man will always fail man in someway or another, but God will never fail Man. And we shouldn't fully place our hopes on Man, but our hopes should be centered around God. I too have been questioning on why i'm always being affected by people, and why it bothers me when i simply don't understand the choices and actions people make sometimes. But then again, i realised it's not up to my control for we all have our free will. Just today, i was just thinking....maybe all the topsy-turvy feelings i'm having right now is purely because of myself, for i chose to be affected and failed to control my emotions.

Being a christian, I realised that it's harder than it seems to love people whom you find it hard to love, and especially so when you've been hurt greatly by someone before. Yet, nobody truly understands other than God. It's not about unforgiveness, it's about letting go my inner fears. I know that God has a plan, and sometimes, friendships are just not meant to be. Well... it seems like i'm back in square 1 again as always... but i choose to take it as a time of learning, a time of seeking, a time of discerning, and a time to be refreshed in His presence. I pray that whatever happens, God will show me the way and the right words and actions that i should carry out...so that whoever it may be, will be able to see love that is from Christ.